Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Where we are

It's a different course I'm taking. 
Unlike the usual ones that I go through all the time. 

It's all new to me and it makes me curious. Wondering what's the next step? When's the right time? How is this gonna turn out? 

There's only so much I can do or ask. 
I'm in no rush for results but all I want is assurance to ensure that everything is aligned. 

Even then, no one can be too sure of anything. 

Monday, August 26, 2013

When will I ever learn?

I never seem to learn from the past. 
Instead I keep doing the same thing that leads to the same results. 

Sigh, just wish I had better control of myself. 
Need to get a grip. 


Sunday, August 25, 2013

The anthem

Don't break me down
I've been travelin' too long
I've been trying too hard
With one pretty song




"I believe in the kindness of strangers. And when I’m at war with myself I ride, I just ride."


I'm not a pessimist, just a skeptic

"You think too much"
"Don't be so negative"
"Don't be too hard on yourself"

That's what people always tell me. But here's why.

"You think too much"

I'm a female. The female's brain is designed to think a lot whereby everything you do is somehow connected. We do not categorize things, somehow everything is related because we care about how certain actions will affect other aspects our life. In other words, I'm just being thoughtful and care about my surroundings in the most selfless way you can ever imagine.


"Don't be so negative"

I'm not a pessimist, just a skeptical creature who believes that not all that glitters is gold. Somehow there's a catch somewhere. Although I do believe that there are some instances that are genuine. I know my assumptions may seem negative but maybe I got this from my mom's expect the worst attitude. That's just how she brought me up.


"Don't be too hard on yourself"

Self quality control maybe? But I guess this is also part of the expect the worst attitude where I feel that somehow something will screw up and its because of something that I did wrong somewhere. Honestly, I am not aware of what I'm doing right in my life, I only know that whatever I do somehow will fuck things up somewhere.

I did ask, "Tell me what I'm doing right?"
He answered, "Being yourself."
That is, to me, the most wonderful thing I've ever heard.

Afraid

When I wake up I’m afraid, somebody else might take my place 
When I wake up I’m afraid, somebody else might end up being me