Monday, October 31, 2011

To: You

Its been 39 days

39 days ago, we held each other's hands throughout the whole day, hugged each other tightly, and gave one last kiss before watching you leave and disappear into the crowd of all the hustle and bustle of the airport.

I remember sitting at the bench facing the night view of the airport, watching the sky train, hoping to catch one last glimpse of you. At the same time, crying over the thought of not being able to see you for 9 months. 
Also, anxiously waiting for your call before you board the plane.

At that same moment, in my heart, I was hoping and praying that all the promises we made together will be kept and not broken despite the distance.
Hoping that nothing bad will happen to either one of us.
Hoping that things will be better for the both of us.
Hoping that things will go smoothly.
Hoping to see each other again.

Life - It's never easy.
Promises - It's easier said than done.
True facts.

I guess it depends on the person himself or herself to make things easier for each other.
It also depends on the person himself or herself on how they want to keep their promises and not break them.
At the end of the day, a relationship is like a partnership where it takes 2 persons to put in effort and make it work.
I mean, its not easy for either one of us to be away for so long since we've been together for 2 years and 4 months. 
External influences can really mess up your thoughts and make you wonder whether he is telling you 100% or less of the truth.
But at the end of the day, despite the wondering, I do trust him.

What if..
Only one person in the partnership is putting in all the effort while the other just slacks off thinking that everything is OK when in fact, its not. 
Then we have a problem here. 
And its up to the both of them to come to a compromise whether they wanna work it out or just dissolve.

I guess it takes a lot of patience, perseverance, tolerance and strength to keep up with this.
Sometimes I feel like I'm too free and I'll be waiting for his messages.
But on the other hand, he seems really busy all the time.
Waiting to be able to spend some quality time to BBM or Skype him seems like forever.
Maybe the way I think is..
"When you Skype me without me asking means that you really wanna see me ^^ and not because I forced you to -_- "
Well, yeah..I don't wanna force you to do something which inconveniences you.
Oh well..Complicated, perhaps.

But at the end of the day,

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

I Love You From Afar

Thursday, October 20, 2011

*sobs* :(


Honestly :/


Just so you know what goes on in my mind everyday

Our first date, perhaps?

A friendly reminder :)

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Let Down

Of all people, I thought you would understand since you should know me well enough by now that I won't look for anyone else.

Doubts are disappointing and hurtful.
Especially yours.

Monday, October 10, 2011

I am blinded by love

Hope you'll see this and understand :(

"Blinded By Love"
I came home and nothing was right 
It's been a while since a fight 
Well, maybe tonight my need for love 
Can blind my sight 

And I say things out of spite 
Or I push you aside 
No, I don't know how to fix it 
I am falling apart and I am breaking your heart 

 Help me to see
'Cause I am blinded by love, blinded by love 
And help me to be the one to guide us 
Through the dark things we do 

Now I know I can be tough sometimes 
My words come out like knives 
Cutting the space between us 
And you try, yeah, I know you try 

To just let things slide 
But what good is that to us? 
Oh, oh, I don't know 
I am falling apart and I am breaking your heart 

 Help me to see
'Cause I am blinded by love, blinded by love 
And help me to be the one to guide us 
Through the dark things we do 

Oh, I don't know what possibly changed 
We were so good, so good 
And where is the light at the end of this tunnel 
'Cause I am falling apart and I am breaking your heart

Monday, October 03, 2011

Saturday, October 01, 2011

Imma tough cookie

I shall stay strong. That's what I always tell myself.
I'm proving to myself that I can handle my life on my own.
I can't let this make me be sad for the next few months.
I believe life still goes on as usual with a smile.
At the end of the day, this is an obstacle and if we pass it, it will definitely strengthen our relationship.

Like I said, imma tough cookie. 